Growing up as a child, I figured something. I didn’t know how to say NO.
At first, it wasn’t much of a big deal, probably because I was still confined in my home, between fences.
I was a shy little girl who would rather lay herself as a carpet for you to thread on than saying NO to your request. I just didn’t know how to do it. I couldn’t even try. Not even after our Social-Studies teacher taught us in Junior Secondary School 2.
Should I link it with little exposure? YES. I wasn’t so exposed; it affected me a great deal! Some other people might not need to be exposed to learn some things, but on my part, such was the case and it wasn’t so nice.
Time rolled by, and I kept growing. I had to leave home when I was 13, to my Aunt’s at Agbulegba, Lagos, for a very important exam. It was the first time I’d leave my parents; I attended day school all along. During my stay there, I got to discover more about myself; some things I never knew.
It was either the change of parenting I was under or the tutorial I attended that connected me with a new set of people. Or both.
Although I was 13, I was quite matured; a smallish smart girl who had a year left to finish High School. But when it comes to saying NO, I’m caught between edges.
I figured I’d rather hurt in silence than walk up to you and confront you for what you have done. Even if I were given the opportunity to explain myself to an older person, I’d break down into tears and lack the words. All these are, in a way, linked to my inability to say NO.
At the age of 13, I started discovering myself, and tried escaping dangerous situations; situations where I could have easily said NO, and moved on with life, smoothly.
To be continued…
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