Relationships are really sweet. When I say relationship, I mean romance/love relationship.
And if you’ll agree, teenage love relationships are usually the loveliest. You guys are still rocking your teen adventure, full of energy and glowing looks.
Nowadays, it is somewhat strange to see an average 21st-century teenager who’s never been or isn’t in a love bond. They call it boyfriend and girlfriend and it’s been made so obligatory that there are some insecurities you feel when you are not in one.
In my secondary school days, I could remember how guys who had no girlfriend were evacuated from groups in the class. Nobody wants to regard you if you’re not among. So, everyone seeks to have a love relationship even when they are far from the prerequisites.
Having a love life in your teenage years isn’t a bad thing to do. Of course, there are folks whose relationship survived the storms and are now happily married. It works, but it’s absolutely rare.
A love relationship is susceptible to lots of problems. Problems that are usually too critical for a budding adult to counter.
There’s more to love than crush and feelings. These are ephemeral. The beauty you behold on the outside is cool but do you know there are lots of ugliness to deal with when you get into it? The Prince charming charisma that freaks you is great but are you aware that there are more of Prince troubles you need to war with?
Based on the experiences I gathered from people and myself, here are the 7 reasons you should stay clear of relationship as a teenager:
1. You are not ready
Most often, you really aren’t ready for it. You just want to do it because your friends are doing it and oh, you can’t stand the pain of being isolated. When your desire to have a love life is stemming from external influences, it is wise that you get a hold of yourself and stop being dragged about. Because hey, you sure are going to hate the aftermath.
2. Somehow, you’re sacrificing yourself
A love relationship is so demanding. You’re giving out a huge portion of your time, your resources, your commitment and ultimately, your heart. As a teenager, you’re surely still a student, a child living under his parents, a brother or sister to his/her siblings. So, normally, responsibilities are lying on you and when you combine a love relationship with it, the scene becomes like two drivers wrestling to hold the steering while the car is being driven. A fatal accident is imminent.
3. You’ll see the flaws of your partner
It is until you actually go deeper with your partner in a relationship that flaws will begin to lose coverings. And well, it may hurt you as a teenager to suddenly realize the ugly sides of your sweetheart that you may not be able to keep up with.
Relationships entail knowing the totality of who you and the other person are. As time goes on, you begin to see that you’ve gotten to know all there is to the person. Things that catch your eyes at the early stages, don’t anymore. It doesn’t look like there’s anything new again and this is where the salt of the relationship loses quality.
Overfamiliarity is dangerous. But it is an inevitable thing in a love relationship.
This is where our cruxes expose the level of our weakness as teenagers. The fact that our parents who have been married for a score years or more are still living like they got married yesterday, explains the littleness of our strength to cope with overfamiliarity as teenagers. Teenagers get bored in relationships once they exhaust all there is to fancy about. Because we like fun, yeah?
5. Your emotions are vulnerable
This may not be the case for some but most teenagers are still vulnerable emotion wise. Vulnerable in the sense that people’s actions dictate the state of your heart. Watch out for the worst in a love relationship. You’ll be snubbed, you’ll be ridiculed, you’ll be insulted, you’ll be shouted at, you’ll be taken for granted, you’ll be annoyed, you’ll be blamed. Anything happens.
You’d see your partner do to you things that you can’t imagine. Can your emotions stand all these? For instance, imagine getting to school in the morning to find your boyfriend who’d snubbed you all night playing carelessly with girls. Can you graciously walk up to him, hold him in the hands, look into his eyes and say “I love you”? It sounds cool in theory, a lot of teenagers would, in this case, sulk all day. But these are things that happen. Give your intention to go into a relationship a second thought.
6. You’ll be tired
We live in a generation that doesn’t value perseverance. This is evident on the 21st-century teenagers. We don’t have time to keep patching things up over and over like our older fellows.
Relationships can make us feel really tired because we never had what it takes to delve into one. Tolerance is part of what it takes. Teenagers virtually lack it. So we tend to freak out when we’re tired.
7. You’ll break up
Most Teenagers don’t have the capacity to handle a relationship successfully. The start is as good as the end. Awful things happen in life that is usually too weighty for teenagers to handle. If you fail to realize this, you’ll rush in and rush out. It will get so bad that you’ll wonder what brought you into it in the first place. You’ll wish you hadn’t. And yeah, you’d think you were better off without one. The rest is a story.
This is what has happened to me. We, teenagers, like picking things up even without proper training. We are wired in such a way that we are always seeking to jump processes. It is lethal and it’s not advisable.
I even think no teenager can handle a relationship. Recalling the story of my friends in secondary school, they were lovers from the second year in Secondary School up until 100 Level in the University. No sane person would think they weren’t going to get married but it became a story that touches.
Have I discouraged someone? Here’s my sorry. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to. But we need some frankness sometimes.
Your relationship could be great as a teenager, yeah. I wish you good luck and I wish that it doesn’t get broken.
See you at the top!
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