You stood there watching him say everything he likes about you, if you were white, you would have blushed but it was obvious you also like him, he was done talking.
“Did he just ask me out?” you ask yourself, feeling embarrassed, you told him how much you like him too and how nice he has been since you knew him in JSS1. Happily, he smiled, and you finally told him you would get back to him. The following day after school, you told him you appreciate his sincerity, looking at your palm, you told him the right word… A blunt NO!
Did I just say that? You asked yourself, seeing your Bruno Mars who would catch a greenade for you leaving made you feel hurt. Two weeks later, you found out he started dating your bestie which was killing. How could he do such? You asked yourself countless times, feeling like you are losing your life.
You would be promoted to SS2 in a few months time; the girl you had always crushed on finally got more nerves than you to tell you how much she had always liked you from JSS2, she felt you both are now matured to handle your emotions. So dating was the next option, Wow!!! Did she just say that? Tell her you love her too… You thought.
Your mouth wide open, words failed you, you smiled like you didn’t understand her statement. After school, you sat her down and told her how long you had waited for this, BUT! You don’t want to hurt her. Hearing this, she felt bitter and less of herself, she left you and you felt ungrateful for letting a long time crusher leave you. She refused to talk to you ever since; she updated her status on Whatsapp and it has to do with heartbreak, but you never wanted to break her heart… You just had to say it.
Hmm… I sigh heavily.
Why am I feeling this way, like I’m torn apart? You ask.
I smiled broadly “it is called emotions” I reply.
So, let’s talk about it!
You did the right thing by saying a NO, but you are sad. The person who allegedly said he/she loves you is now dating someone else because you said a NO. There is no point losing a war for an argument, you can keep a platonic friendship for years without any strings attached rather than dating for a term and become sworn enemies afterwards. As teenagers, especially while in secondary school, it is not advisable to go into a relationship.
But I love him and he loves me too.
How sure are you to know it is LOVE? Check the scriptures, Love would wait, so if you are in a rush, it is obvious it is not love.
I feel like the odd one out of my friends.
It is normal, you should not be the same as your friends, because you are a godly teen, you should be different. Learn to stand out.
So what do you suggest I do?
You need to know what makes you attracted to the person. In a situation where your parents are not always around, you are always indoor, you don’t have friends to talk to, and your crush is the only person you can pour your heart to, you need to get a friend of same sex with, to always talk to.
“Frequent communications with the opposite sex triggers emotions”
I had few things in mind at teenagehood which helped me.
• If my parents finds out I am dating him, won’t they feel disappointed?
• Am I matured enough to handle a relationship?
• What would be the ending point of the relationship, after secondary school?
I had to find answers to these questions, and it was difficult for me to answer them.
How did you feel then? You ask.
I felt hurt, seeing a person I like beefing me because I said a NO, but it was good. So when I remember those moments, I smile at my silly self.
If he/she breaks up after a term, you hear he starts dating a junior, would you be able to handle that depression?
My dear, that’s why dating at teenagehood is wrong.
You should not feel less of yourself because he has a new girlfriend, it is barely a week you said a NO, she has started oppressing you with your friend because you are mummy’s boy who can’t ask a girl out.
Calm down… LOVE would wait no matter what.
If you need someone to catch a greenade for you, Jesus can, only him can do such.
You don’t need a guy/girl to count on in times of trouble. The HOLYSPIRIT is enough. Fall in love with the HOLY SPIRIT, face your studies, the journey is still long to waste your time at the filling station.
Save yourself from heartbreaks, depression and you would be happy.
P.S In case you have fallen victim of a wrong relationship and you can’t seem to get over it, perhaps you need a listening ear, we are here for you.
You can always leave me a comment or reach our email address.
~From a caring heart.