No one wants a nagging parent or one who keeps being a pain in the neck , but what do we do when we find ourselves in such situation?
Growing up, I’ve come to understand that no matter how much we drift away from our parents, or even hate them, it doesn’t change the fact that they birthed us. They may be your worst enemy but you wouldn’t have been existent if not for them.
I understand that there are times when you wish you were never birthed, but while you groom over that wish, you forget the good times you’ve had with amazing people, the wonderful things you are yet to unfold, and the stillness that lits up your smile. You forget all those and hate that your parents ever made you existent.
95% teenagers today will agree with me that parents can be annoying sometimes. Maybe not that kind of persistent annoyance but that kind that would get your stomach rumbled and you wish you could squeeze them in your palms and have a little peace of mind. At one point or the other, parents get on our nerves; if it’s not Mum, it’ll be Dad, or vice-versa, or both! You just want to yell!
Now, let me shock you. This is part of our teenage syndrome; let’s name it that. All teenagers feel same way; some even scream out words like ‘my Dad hates me!’ ‘my mum hates me!’. I’d love it if you can have a little chat with those in their twenties—ask them how they felt about their parents as teenagers and how they do now. Many of those in their twenties tend to understand parents better, and in some cases, even love them more.
Could it be because they’ve grown to know them more? Or their understanding of them improved? Right! We’re on track.
How do we overcome pressure from our parents? The pressure I’m referring to here is synonymous to discomfort.
- Be still when they are all over with their fuss, either you are at fault or not: Most times, they are likely to be right, so let’s listen. It could be over-the-cyber-chat and not a physical encounter, stay calm online and swallow the words. It’s not easy, but you’ll get used to it along the line. Talk, only when the situation requires it.
- Never raise your voice back at them: They should earn your respect. My mother once told me ‘even if your mother is a witch or a whore, she still earns your respect as your mother!’. Now, I’m not saying my mum is all that or your mum has to be that; all that’s there to it is that no matter how filthy or irritating or unwelcoming your parents are or their ideas are, they should still earn your respect, for being your parents. Nothing changes that.
- Learn your magic words: Be quick to say please, sorry, excuse me, thank you. Only the proud would refuse to use those words, even to your parents? I know, you are not at fault, and when they should be saying sorry instead, they aren’t? Let it go; do yours and move on.
- Remember that it will pass: You can’t ever remain a teenager. This phase will pass and another will surface. You’ll just have to endure some things. For those that will have to leave home and travel far away for studies, the ‘teenage pressure’ gets off them a bit. Always tell yourself ‘it’s only for a while’.
- Make them happy: There are numerous ways to gladden your parents’ hearts irrespective of what they’ve done for you. Remember it’s about you and how you feel, not them. Be responsive to whatever they ask of you; buy them gifts; chip in some personal things to them from time to time; let them see you smile and do amazing things; do well in your studies and make them proud!
I really hope you find this article helpful. Your feelings matter a lot and you are responsible for how good or bad you feel. Stay strong!
What do you think? Are there any other means to overcome this pressure that you’d love to share with us? Let’s hear your thoughts in the comments below