Who is a virgin?
A virgin is a person who has never had sexual intercourse.
Now, there is a difference between being a virgin and staying pure. A person can be a virgin and be impure if he/ she engages in acts such as masturbation, solo sex, etc. However, a person who has been deflowered, but has now refrained from all sexual acts can be said to be pure even while no longer being a virgin. However, a person can be a virgin and still be pure!
Should virginity be a personal decision?
Yes, it should be and it is a personal decision.
As teenagers, we are influenced by so many things around us; our friends through peer pressure, and the media, which is a huge part. Hence, if one is to make certain decisions especially on an issue such as whether to remain a virgin or not, one has to make it based on personal values and thoughts.
“My best friend is a virgin and so I think it is a great idea if I also remain a virgin”
Some people choose to remain virgins because their friends are virgins, others choose to for the fear of being caught by their parents if they have sex and for some, they choose to remain a virgin so as to keep it as gifts for their future spouses. All these are wrong reasons to want to remain a virgin.
Your being a virgin should not be because you want to feel among your friends who are. This is because if you do so, the day those friends change their view concerning virginity is the day your own view too changes.
“My friends are having sex, so it is not bad if I give it a try”
No, you are not your friend and your friend is not you. If you have friends who pressure you into having sex because they have had it, then I think it is time to let go of such friends.
Another thing is this, your decision on whether to remain a virgin should not be based on what the social media says. Nowadays, social media makes it feel like virgins no longer exists and that it is very rare to find a virgin and considers it archaic to remain a virgin. That is a lie you should never buy. Being a virgin and remaining pure is something to be proud of and never to be ashamed of and taking a personal decision to remain so helps you not to compromise.
Now, apart from the personal stance taken to remain a virgin, it is important for us to examine what the scripture says about it.
Romans 12:1 I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.
As teenagers, God has called on everyone of us to present ourselves as living sacrifice to Him, He has called on us to dedicate our lives and bodies to him by keeping ourselves from sexual immorality.
One issue I have with being a virgin is when everyone focuses on the females whenever the topic of virginity is raised. This is wrong, as both male and female alike are urged to flee sexual immorality and to be chaste, giving glory to God through their lifestyles and keeping their bodies as the temple of the living God.
Your being a virgin based on your personal decision should be to please God and not because you want to present it as a trophy to your spouse in the future. This is because it is God that preserves us and keeps us going.
Now, if you have lost your virginity through one way or the other, you can still rededicate your body to God. You can choose to remain pure and chaste even without your virginity and your body would still be accepted to God as a reasonable service. If you are still a virgin, please flee youthful lusts and refuse to be impure through other sexual acts.
Yes, we can.
What do you have to say about this? I’ll love to hear from you in the comments below. Also, don’t forget to subscribe to this blog to not miss a post.