In this present day and age, setting aside ego and acknowledging our flaws when we know we are wrong, has seriously become an issue. This results from the fact that so many of us have fallen victim to a distorted definition or concept of what real strength is.
In my own opinion, strength is being able to own up to one’s mistakes, it is being able to dish out unconditional love to someone who doesn’t deserve it.
Real strength is taking the first step in initiating reconciliation even when you know that you were not completely wrong.
But then again, we do not want to be like paper tossed by the wind, we want to be founded on a good foundation of reasons for which we have or need to apologize. So, come to a point in which you ask yourself why? Why do I need to right a wrong and apologize?
Well, there a couple of reasons available to support that conviction
1. It mends relationships
Although apologies don’t undo past actions, they play a big role in preventing the negative effects that ensue these actions. The avoidance of such a scenario can be quite relieving on both the part of the receiver and giver of the apology. The above mentioned relationships could be the one you have with your teacher at school, your colleague at work or even the one you have with your siblings.
Whatever the case may be, making an apology prevents you from being stuck in the past and doing it in the right way proves that maintaining the relationship is more important to you than maintaining your ego. God’s desire is for us to be at peace with all men, so settling small and big disputes alike, by simply making an apology is truly God- glorifying.
2. It has a liberating effect
Emotionally, something happens when you decide to utter the simple words ‘I’m sorry’ in a meaningful way. One gets liberated from the guilt and shame and every negative energy that was bottled up turns into a positive energy of relief.
3. Apologies have Health Benefits
I may not be a psychologist but I do believe that there is some kind of connection between the soul and the body. Holding on to negative emotions, either in the place of holding back an apology or not forgiving someone, can have a detrimental effect on your physical health, which according to scientific studies result in increased heart rates and blood pressure as well as unsteady breathing. Making apologies however, results in a reverse effect. It’s all about being true to yourself, having a good sense of responsibility and making the move to apologize when there is a need for it.
The positive vibe which you radiate towards the person receiving the apology, will surely come back to you mentally and physically. So, be strong , take that step because it will surely work out for your good as well.
How to go about Apologizing
Now, it’s very easy to pronounce the words ‘I’m sorry’ in a meaningless manner and yet very hard to pronounce those same words meaningfully. Don’t just let ‘I’m sorry’ slip out of your mouth emptily, do it intentionally and with the right attitude.
Recently, I confronted a friend of mine, telling him about how I felt about how he had been treating me. His response, to my surprise, was positive, he owned up to his mistake and uttered ‘I’m sorry’, but then he didn’t just stop there, he portrayed those words with actions because the next time we met, he was super excited to see me, I could clearly see the change in his body language and the tone of his voice towards me. That’s the way!
Go on to apologize but then do it in the right way, meaningfully with true conviction and remorse. In this manner, the apology will have a greater impact on the person it is being metted out to.
Sacrifice is at the heart of repentance without deeds your apology is worthless
-Bryan Davis
Say it with words and back it up by actions.
To conclude, apologizing isn’t a sign of weakness, it is a sign of great strength and humility. So never be afraid to do it.
I hope this pushes you to apologize when you should and be conscious about healthy relationships.
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