Dear pregnant teen,
I know you just cringed reading that and your heart just skipped a beat. You have been hoping you’ll wake up from this nightmare but the fifth pregnancy test kit has given you the same result: “positive”.
Words can’t really describe how you feel right now but if you could turn back the hands of time, you’ll make completely different choices. You feel lost, you feel like your life just came to an end, traded on a platter of a few minutes of pleasure. Truth is, life as you know it has just come to an end. No decision you take at this point would take your life back to what it was. You are at a point in your life where whatever decision you take would change your life forever and so, it’s of utmost importance that you make the right choice that you’ll be grateful for forever.
I’d like to share some bitter truths with you:
1. Life as you know it has just come to an end
I think this is one of the things you need to acknowledge and accept first. Normally, pregnant teens have three options: abortion, adoption or birthing and raising the kid. It is important to know that your life will never be the same regardless of the option you settle for. No decision you take at this point would take your life back to what it was.
Life now might not necessarily be difficult but it will definitely be different. Also, while you think of what to do, please take into consideration that you are deciding for two people- you and the human you’re carrying in your womb. That human’s life is in your hands and it’s no fault of his/hers that he/she is there right now. So, please, as you think of what’s best for you, please think of what’s best for him/her too.
2. Don’t expect support, you might not get it
This is one of the most painful part of being a pregnant teen especially when you are one of those who take other people’s opinion, then you are in for a real tough ride. Even if you take other people’s opinion in high esteem, this might be the time to grow up and face your business. Without adding extra pressure on yourself by taking other people’s opinion into serious consideration, you are going to face a lot of criticisms and judgements from people who have zero tolerance for your current state. You would have people take one look at you and turn up their noses. People who think they are better than you. Please, know that this isn’t true. If you haven’t had a tough skin before now, it is time to develop one.
3. A baby in your womb is no excuse to be mediocre
You see, most of the people we were referring to in no 2 above are people who expect that because you are now pregnant, your life has come to an end and nothing good can come out of your Jerusalem. Well, this isn’t true. You still have a life. Your dreams are not rendered invalid just because you have a baby in a womb. The period of being pregnant is just a tiny fragment of the timeline of your life. You owe yourself the debt of making it in life regardless, especially when you have decided to keep your baby and not give him/her up for adoption. You need to realise that you owe your child a good life. Yes, things might be a little hard from the onset, especially when you do not have rich parents who can confidently take up one more mouth to feed, but you have to be determined to make it regardless.
Read books, set goals, get a job. Set your mind to do your very best and go after your goals, let absolutely nothing stop you from reaching your goals.
Now, some good news:
4. There is always a way
Having said all I have prior to this point, you’re probably wondering how you’ll ever make it. I had to put this separately as it’s one very important point on its own. Things might look very impossible right now but you need to have and accept the mindset that there is always a way. You can find something you never knew existed. So, bear it in mind that there is always a way; this is the first step to finding it.
5. God’s still got you
You probably got pregnant by consensual sex or maybe rape or probably by a few minutes of wild craziness. However it happened, you are probably feeling like God’s very far from you. This is me telling you this is not so. See:
“The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Psalm 34:18
God is longing to wrap you in His arms and whisper to your ears that everything would be alright. See again:
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. – Jeremiah 29:11
I know you feel like it is over and your future is all messed up already but see that promise. Even at this state, God has plans for you. He wants to give you a future, He wants to give you a hope.
In case you’re wondering what kind of future or hope He wants to give you, it is clearly stated there that the pans he has are plans to prosper you. You might not know those plans, you might not feel it but He knows them and He has them all mapped out.
Now see this:
And we know that in all things, God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. – Romans 8:28
I don’t care if you have had a relationship with Him before now or not, it doesn’t matter. If you’ll come to Him now, He is able to make all things work out for your own good. He is able to turn this massive mess you are in right now into a tremendous testimony.
I know it wouldn’t be far fetched that thoughts of “why did God let this happen to me?” have crossed your mind. Well, I’m sorry but what happened is no fault of God’s. Man has the power of choice and our misuse of this power is what gets us into trouble most times. Even if you were raped and didn’t choose your current state, it might not be your fault but you are suffering the consequence of someone else’s wrong use of the power of choice and this isn’t God’s fault either but today God is calling you to:
Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Matt 11:28
You don’t have to walk through this lonely path alone. He’s calling you into rest and peace regardless of what you have to go through, accept Him.
So, with these few points of mine, I hope I have been able to convince and not to confuse you, my pregnant teen, that your life ain’t over, you’re only just getting started and it depends on you whether it will end up beautiful or not.
Lots of love,
Are there other things you feel a pregnant teen should know? Feel free to share below.
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