Most of my friends whom we graduated from secondary school together are now in 300level while I am still in 100level. Oh! My secondary school mates now drives the latest car in town while I struggle to even pay for cab transports. Will I ever be able to afford a dress that expensive? Hmm, I am such a failure.
These are the questions we do ask ourselves, and the thoughts we beat ourselves with especially as young adults. I have been in this shoes myself where I try to base my achievements, my passions, my desires, my whole life, on that of another but trust me, as I have learned: it is a BAD thing to judge yourself with the results of others; it is an ‘infectious’ way to think of yourself that way.
Am I saying it is not right to emulate people, have mentors and/or role models? Come on, that’s not what I mean. It is not a bad idea to have someone you are looking up to, it is not wrong to allow someone lead you on, it is not a problem to want to achieve what another has achieved. But it becomes a problem when you try to be like them at all cost without even knowing their full success story, their sacrifices, the pain that comes with what you think/what you are seeing them enjoy.
It becomes a problem when you are pressurized (Self-inflicted pressure) to be who you really are not, when you place yourself under the pressure to do things you really and sincerely do not want to do, when you neglect your moral values and virtues just because you want to ‘meet up’, when you force yourself to conform to ideas that even yourself know is not right.
You should Know this: There will always be some people ahead of you, there will always be the ones who are behind you, there will always be the ones you look forward to, and the ones that are looking forward to you no matter how bad or how much of a failure you think you are. So, stay true to your own process, don’t run ahead of the process, follow it through.
But how can I break away from these pressure(s), you ask? Well, how I wish there were a mystical or magical way to break free from it, but there isn’t.
However, the following are some of the ways you could break away from these pressures:
1. No matter what, BE YOU
There may be some people around you that seem to have achieved far more than you have through lying, stealing, unfaithfulness, and the likes while you are truthful, faithful, and committed. Yet, nothing seem to be working for you as you think it should. No matter what, don’t you ever let that influence you to change who you are.
Stay genuine to your morals, and keep your virtues stable. If you keep living your life to be tossed to and fro by the lives of others, then you might even risk not living your own life and be living a shadow of another person’s life.Tweet
2. Don’t just ‘hustle’ blindly, PLAN YOUR LIFE
When some people use the word hustle, what they mean 90% of the time is that whenever they see any ‘source of income’, no matter what it is, no matter how wrong it is – they are ready to do it as long as it will fetch them money and fast! So, today, they would be into selling bags, tomorrow they are selling gadgets, next week they are into supplying electronics and so on (such attitude that lead youths into committing cyber crimes and engage in what they can never say in the public). I am not saying you should not hustle, but draw a line for yourself, find your passion and stay committed to it. This way you will stay true to your own lane and find joy instead of frustration.
3. Commit yourself to God (believe me, it works)
Many think serving God is ‘boring’! But it isn’t. Committing your life to him preserves you, giving your heart to his word keep you ‘sane’ in this world we live in. Yes, many of your friends may look at you and call you ‘boring’ but ignore them. Hide yourself in God and find peace.
You might have gone in so deep and you are thinking you can never get out of it anymore. That’s not true. You can still come out of that ‘pressure influenced’ life that you are living and let God help you.
Only a fool say I live my life the exact way my friends are! Your friends don’t own your life, you do.Tweet
Take charge and live a pressure free life…
I hope you got something from this. Do leave a comment below and don’t forget to subscribe to this blog to not miss a post.