When I hear the word Mistake, what comes to mind is a series of experience I have hadnwith this unpleasant word that comes with rather unpleasant situations, happenings or events that I have had to face!
Let us see the definition of Mistake as documented in the Cambridge English Dictionary. It states: ‘it is an action, a decision or judgment that produces an unwanted or unintentional result’; likewise, Dictionary.com defines Mistake as: ‘inaccuracy, fault, oversight, error; slip from right, accuracy, correctness or truth – a mistake is caused by bad judgment or disregard of rule or principle’.
Now, I don’t mean to bore you with how this word is defined in English dictionaries but in order to have a solid grasp of how to move on after
making mistakes, you have to understand what making a mistake really means.
You see, the first thing you must understand in life is that mistakes are inevitable. I don’t mean to sound like one of those motivational speakers, as you might have heard that phrase from one before – but trust me, to try to live life with the mindset of not making mistakes is to be untruthful to oneself .
Why? You ask. Well, it is simple. It is because you would venture into something for the first time, meet a strange person you have to ‘brush up’ to communicate with and it might not turn out well at first. You would meet someone that your best effort is nothing to them, so every step you take seems wrong or is wrong to them, given the fact that they are better exposed than you are. In such situations, you’re bound to make mistakes.
This doesn’t mean you should expect mistakes from every action you take or decisions you make. For it to be a mistake, it must be unintentional. If you’ve never made any mistake or it has been a while since you made one, then you might not be doing well enough in life or you just haven’t been trying new things.
If you are like me, you must have had times when you sat back and regret ever saying a particular word, days you would think: oh! How I wish I have a time machine to go back and fix that. So bad that when you see movies where such a device was used , you would often wish to travel back in time.
You would see the person you acted roughly to and remember the unpleasant event that followed your action. Even their face alone is enough to remind you of your action. Some of them even talk about it almost every time they see you and this haunt/taunt you so much. There might even be some mistakes you’ve made years/months ago and they still bother you up to date – all of this and more is inevitable. You have to learn to move on.
Mistakes are unavoidable but how you move on after you’ve made them is what you must understand and instil in you.
How do I move on, you ask?
1. Acceptance: Accept that You Have Made a Mistake
Many think they are ‘Mr./Mrs. know it all’ so, even when they have taken a wrong step, they risk still seeing it. They remain adamant even after the mistake has been pointed out to them.
You have to be open, making a mistake doesn’t mean you are fool neither does it mean you cannot do a particular thing, it only means there is something you didn’t do right.
2. Analyzing: Sit Back, Analyze the Steps you Took
Think about those words you said, ruminate on that proposal submitted, ask that friend why they felt the way they did about what you did to them. Ask yourself the sincere question: ‘where did I get it wrong?’ There is no need to lie to yourself or try to make yourself believe that it never happened, that would be unwise.
It has happened already. It is not a dream but a fact, it is a reality; you have
missed it, you have failed that Exam, you have said a wrong word, and the relationship you have with that friend has been destroyed.
Don’t run from it, face it and ask yourself: how and why did it happen? Where did I get it wrong?
3. Helping Zone: Seek for Help
Don’t be among those who think they don’t need anyone, that they are self-sufficient. Thinking you need no one is laughable and unrealistic. Look around for those who have made it in that area that you’ve failed at, get materials and read, seek elderly advice; don’t you ever think you need no help. You do need some! Maybe that’s why you failed in the first instance.
So, look on the brighter side, mistakes make you a better person. It helps you speak where others cannot, as you can direct and lead those trying to take the wrong step that you took.
Do you want to be among those who say: “I Quit” “I am like this because I kept failing” OR those who say “I made mistakes but now, I have evolved” “I failed but now, I am successful” “i kept pushing, I never gave up”.
The world does not celebrate failures. “It is too hard, so I gave up” is not pleasing to hear but when you can stand and say: “despite all i failed at, i rose above all”, you are the real hero.
Failure shouldn’t be the end of the journey.
How do you handle failure? Feel free to share in the comments below and don’t forget to subscribe to this blog to not miss a post.